11/4/07
I’m a farm girl, can’t you tell? My tights may be turquoise but my eyes are curious and my heart is swollen with life’s plentitudes. I’m naïve and I like it—all I want to do is learn! I can go anywhere in the world and see how people get along. The good and the bad. I’ve worried about me for too long, why are you looking at me like that? Because I know you know: I’m definitely not like you.
So what if I’m not the quickest rabbit or the smartest cat? I take my time and if the words don’t come out right well use your imagination. This is my attempt to be me—to amplify my heart! To unbar my mouth and actually speak for once. To get it straight so my eyes aren’t so fuzzy.
I don’t need my glasses and I sure as heck don’t need someone to cheer me up (as of now). I need to spread my arms as far as they reach, feel something soft and warm and graze it on my face! I want to read something so moving that my mouth can only squeal! I dream of being elegant yet natural. To be loving and loved for my dreams too big for my pocketbook. All I wish for is a man to be enwrapped by my soaring hope for the world and for me to love him with all my might that I could only go the distance with him. To create something new and make love like never before. To start a life, mowing lawns, making dinners, reading newspapers, sipping coffee with a smile, rolling in the snow, making noises, dancing on a whim, walking around in underwear, picnics with a happy ending, taking adventures, pushing every button in our bodies to make us scream with passion—gathering every penny to pay bills so we can collapse together in our one bed and feel such deep devotion that all we can do is laugh and kiss endlessly. We can make it.
Enjoy the simplest times and most intriguing details of each other that could be so ordinary, dance like we did in the old days, and feel our hearts rise in our throats as he dips me and our lips spark in connection. We can be it all and still find time to be human.
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it's been a long time, but i'm willing to wait.
